Your coolness level is inversely proportional to how many times you use "inversely proportional" a day

I'm making it a goal of writing everyday in this blog, whether I've had any weird experiences in the last 24 hours or not. I suppose we'll see if this is a problem sooner or later because, quite frankly, I'm not convinced I have that many cool stories about DT. But then again, maybe I don't think I'm going to focus on just DT. Heck, maybe I'll branch out and cover the whole campus. Or not. I don't know, I guess time will tell.

When I wrote the title of this blog, I wanted to say that the phrase "inversely proportional" (though devilishly difficult to spell) was a cool thing to say, but I think I just insulted myself instead. Anyhow, here's my latest theory using "inversely proportional."

My theory on keeping my dorm room clean:

The probablility of my Half of The Room being thrashed at any given point in time is inversely proportional to how close visiting hours are.

No joke, if it's like a random Monday (like today), I'll get this odd urge to clean my room, in spite of the fact that I have numerous homework assignments to complete. However, if it's a wednesday or sunday, I'll completely forget about visiting hours until some girl gets on the elevator with a group of guys and we give her a wierd look until we figure out what day it is. And I've also noticed that guys are definitely losing on the creative-decorating aspect of dorm life. I wandered over to V Hall and I'm telling you, all the rooms I could see looked like ads for Pier One or Ikea. And they're always CLEAN! I've been told otherwise by the girls, themselves, but for the most part, all the one's i've seen were spotless.

Maybe I need to get a rug and some cutains or something.

Modern dance and talking about "Crepuscular Rays" in public

I think I'm in need of more sleep. I mean, I've been sleep deprived since 9th grade when I started seminary, but now that I'm in college, it's getting ridiculous. blech. So I was sitting in my Physics 137: Athmosphere and Weather class the other day(truly, an awe-inspiring subject. Incidentaly My roomate asks for weather reports now, so I give them in my best weatherman voice and gesture emphatically at my computer screen that's displaying the National Weather Service website. crazy.) So I was sitting in my physics class, and the lecture turned to "Crepuscular Rays," which is a fancy way of saying "those nifty shafts of light that you see on a cloudy day." My first thought was "wait a second, is that a Legitimate 'Optial Weather Phenomenon'?" Well, as it turns out, yes, "Crepuscular Rays" are legitimate "Optical Weather Phenomena" along with "rainbows" and "sundogs" (I like sundogs for some reason). But what really makes me shake my head at meterology is the "Optical Weather Phenomenon" called Heiligenshein. Heiligenshein is basically the halo thing that you can see around your shadow's head on grassy-dewey surfaces in the sunlight. I didn't know that this was a legitimate "Optical Weather Phenomenon," but it is. I've personally never seen one, but then again, I've never looked.

So, speaking of modern dance.

On this last Thursday, I got to go to BYU's Dancer's Company's Dance in Concert concert (I'm sure that my English teacher would faint if she saw that sentence). Lemme tell ya, it was INCREDIBLE! It was truly inspiring to watch and that means a lot coming from me, a former Modern-Dance-Mocker. It seemed to me (and kind of still does) that modern dance was created by someone who did it as kind of a joke, but then it caught on, so they had to make up rules to justify the truly randomness of some things. I don't know, I think that someday, we'll meet the creator of modern dance and they'll be like "HA! you thought those were REAL rules!" But in spite of these doubts going into this performance, I was truly blown away. In fact, I think I wasn to try my hand at it someday (I can almost feel my dad cringe. This performance had it all; there was humor, action, romance, and random props. In fact, it was the props that really got me thinking seriously about modern dance. Think about the possibilites for props! As I've been contemplating the performance this weekend, I've thought of a TON of things that could be used. Just to name a few, You could use a huge popcorn maker and have popcorn all over the stage, or like a huge unexplained fish filled with pudding on stage right that would either explode at intermission and spray everyone with pudding or move to stage left, or you could have a life-sized model of someone made out of lettuce, or the dancers could use waterbottles and artfully spray everyone. It boggles my mind to even think about it.

The possibilites are truly endless.


oh, and this guy definiately should do some sort of dance. Heck maybe he could do modern. He'd need props though. Maybe a lettuce statue of someone int he background.

Random picture experiment

This is a gorgeous picture of me.

Stupid elevators and date possibilites

For some odd reason, my internet is moving really slowly today. Thus, in the numerous attempts to reach my blog today, I forgot what I was going to say.

so here's the next best thing.

Yesterday, as Brian and I were going to breakfast, we jump on the elevator and head down to the first floor. But as the elevator hits floor one, it makes this weird ka-CHunk sound and kind of jerks up and down. Brian and I look at each other and then at the door, which opens about 6 inches and then stops. As we peer out of the elevator, it became rapidly apparent that the elevator was about a foot and a half above the floor. So what would YOU do in a situation like that? Brian and I grab a hold of the doors and start pulling with all our might and a guy in the lobby started prying on the other side and then a voice comes out of nowhere and says "Hey, you don't have anyauthority to force those doors open." My first reaction was to say "Oh, RIGHT! I forgot, we hafta be REALLY stuck in order to have any authority to get out of here!" but I was foiled in my clever comeback joke by the fact that I didn't know where the voice had come from. From the look on the guy-in-the-lobby's face, we could tell the voice hadn't come from there, and Brian and I were pretty alone in that elevator (besides, who uses phrases like "you don't have any authority" when telling college kids who happen to be stuck in an elevator to calm down?!). The voice spoke again and said "I'll have you out in a second, I'm up here working on the elevator."

Conclusions:
We either have
a) a hobo living in our dorms in the elevator shaft
b) maintenance guys who enjoy repairing elevators while people still RIDE Them
c) a quick access panel to the elevator shaft that can be accessed quickly by janitors who make weird gospel-themed remarks about being stuck in an elevator

The first two are kind of worrisome to me, but the last one has a lot of untapped possibilites. I mean, think about it, we could just pop on top of an elevator and say crazy stuff and freak out people during visiting hours. It sounds like a date just waiting to happen. At any rate, I've gotta stop doing awkward and embarrassing things in the elevators. There might be maintenance guys or hobos up there.

I think I'm just a crowd follower

Well, here it is. This blog is a direct result of Christina and Paul's blogs, which I think are really cool, so I'm starting my own. I haven't quite figured out what i'm going to use this thing for, but I'll think of something from my wildly crazy college life. As of right now, though, I gotta head for class, which starts in 5 minutes. And I'm kind of annoyed with this lab computer that I'm using which is frozen or something because it has this outrageous popup that says "Nice Work!" right in the middle of the screen that refuses to close.

-Jonathan